The Universal Laws

The Universal Laws, including The Law of Attraction, are all continually at work for everyone. I would like to help you realize that your “dream life” can be yours, and to help you materialize those dreams through the use of universal laws and principles that are always working

By becoming aware of and using The Law Of Attraction, the other Universal laws, Positive thinking, and The Principles for success, learning to harmonize your actions with these powers and re-programing your Subconscious mind, you have the ability to transform your results in every area of life. So the question is, how do you go about changing all these areas of your life and start living the life of your dreams? Keep reading, and I will share everything you need to know to bring about the life you desire.
It is first of all simple, and everyone of us has the tools inside to accomplish the creation of our perfect life. Unfortunately, most people never learn how to utilize these tools to create the life they dream of. They simply don’t know or believe that they can control the outcome of life this way.

The first step is to simply make the choice to do so, and then to change your predominant focus and thoughts. So, for now, just believe that it is possible.

As we continue on, I will share with you precisely how the Universal laws and Principles are always at work creating your reality, either in a positive or negative way, but always according to your own directing of the laws. My goal is to help you use these tools to create your true, innermost desired life filled with Health, Abundance and Happiness.

I will share with you the information that, if you choose to use it, can and will transform your life. The Law of Attraction and all the Universal Laws work in conjunction with the faith you may already practice, so don’t worry that this will conflict with a certain faith. Whether you are of Christian, Jewish, “Spiritual but not religious”, any faith, or of no particular faith at all, The Universal Laws are at work in you.

These Universal Laws and principles are not a Secret and they are not just for an elite few. They are for everyone and they are always at work, whether you are aware of it or not. The Universal Laws, like the physical laws such as gravity, are always at work for everyone whether or not you can see it, know it exists or understand it. The laws are always working, bringing about their results without fail. With the law of gravity, you know if you drop something it is going to fall every time. You don’t need to be a scientist or understand all the mathematical details, you just know it works.

Universal Laws-


“The discovery of Quantum Physics has been vital to unearth the hidden possibilities The Law of Attraction possesses.  We should all thank Dr. Fread Alen Wold, Dr. Emoto, Dr. Amit Goswami and many more who have helped bridge the gap between science and spirituality and to help us more readily understand The Universal Laws with the study of Quantum Physics.
The Law of Attraction- The Law of Attraction is a profound Universal Law which causes whatever energy is sent out into the universe to be joined by or attracted to other energy of an equal or harmonious frequency, vibration, or resonance.

The Law of Vibration- The Law of Vibration states that everything in our universe in its most basic form, both seen and unseen, consists of pure energy or light which resonates as a vibrational frequency or pattern, as demonstrated in quantum physics.

The Law of Abundance and the Law of Growth- The Law of Abundance and the Law of Growth can be seen in the natural and continual growth within our universe. Things are continuously multiplying, producing and growing through these laws. The abundance and type of growth is determined only by the kind and quality of the seed or energy it comes from.

The Law of Cause and Effect- This law is often referred to as “Sowing and Reaping” or “Karma.” The law states that any action will produce or return a result or outcome in the exact proportion to the action or cause which initiated it.

The Law of Resonance- In the Law of Resonance shows that all energy sent out into the universe must be joined by or attracted to other energy of an equal or harmonious frequency, vibration, or resonance which determines and creates your actual results and reality. As quantum physics shows, everything, including thoughts, emotions and beliefs have a vibratory pattern or frequency with a varying degree from positive to negative or high to low.

The Law of Reciprocity- The Law of Reciprocity states that everything ultimately must give and take mutually or must return in kind or degree. This law is completely connected to and works perfectly with all the Universal Laws. The end result is that everything must reciprocate in likeness or in kind or degree.

How To Make A *Positive Difference* Every Single Day

Change your life from making a living to making a difference."

Every morning you should ask yourself "What one thing could I do today that would make a positive difference in my life and the lives of those around me?" And then go out and do it. "ME" I hear you say "Me, little old me, how can I possibly make a difference. I am not important, or powerful, or rich, I am just an ordinary citizen struggling to make a living. How can I make a difference?"
Well the very first thing that you should do is to change your attitude about yourself, because until you think that you are special you won't be. Until you can recognise the magnificent potential that is locked up in side you, strapped down by all those negative beliefs, you will not be able to release it and live to your full potential.
The great tragedy of life is that so many people go to their graves with their lives unlived. They had dreams that they ne.ver acted on. They were too busy living the sort of life that was expected of them. They were so busy trying to please other people, often at the expense of their own desires, that they had no time for their own happiness.
This you must know, there are people who love you, there are people who care about you but until you learn to love yourself, until you learn to care about yourself, until you learn to respect yourself, you will never truly appreciate the love, care and respect of others.
You have the greatest power of any living thing on this planet. You have the power of choice. You have the power to chose how to behave, what to say and when to say it. You have the power to control your attitude. You have the power to make a difference.
You have the power to choose whether your words build or break. You can choose whether your contribution is constructive or destructive. You can choose whether your influence is positive or negative.
Choose to make difference. Choose to look for the positive in all things and if you really cannot find something positive to say or do, then rather do and say nothing. What ever you do, do not add to the negative. Choose to be a centre of certainty in an uncertain world. Choose to create a climate of hope and enthusiasm in yourself and the people around you.
Realise that you do not have to do something earth shattering to make a difference. It's the little things that often have the greatest impact. A smile, a friendly word, a compliment, a helping hand, a sympathetic ear, these are the things that you can do every day and the only cost is that you put your ego in your pocket for a while and you give your attention to the other person's feelings.
Learn to get your satisfaction from helping others to feel better about themselves and their lives. Have the courage, because you love and respect yourself and you realise that you are a wonderful person, to reach out to others confident and secure in your own strength.
When you were born you were given the gift of life, may to-day be the day that you accept that gift. Realise that you were designed for accomplishment, engineered for success and endowed with the seeds of greatness. Strip off your suit of worry and despair, put on the armour of belief and enthusiasm then march boldly into life. Take no timid steps, think no timid thoughts. Dare to become all you are capable of becoming.

Dare to "Change your life from making a living to making a difference."

5 Things You Can Start Doing Today to Change Your Life

“Everything is something you decide to do, and there is nothing you have to do.”
Denis Waitley

“If you wait to do everything until you’re sure it’s right, you’ll probably never do much of anything.”
Win Borden
Perhaps the most important thing you can do to improve your life is simply to do things. To take action and learn along the way.
Here are five suggestions for “do-habits” that are very helpful to adopt to radically improve your life.
1. Do it first thing in the morning.
How you start your day tends to have a big influence on that day. It sets the context in your mind. I believe that one key to better consistency and improvement in your life is what you do early in the day. Two ways to get a good start to your day are these:

• Do the hardest/ most important/ most uncomfortable thing first in your day. If you start your day by doing it you will feel relieved. You feel relaxed and good about yourself. And the rest of the day – and your to-do list – tends to feel a lot lighter and easier to move through. It’s amazing what difference this one action makes.
• Start small. To get from a state where you just feel like sitting on your chair and doing nothing much to one where you take action over and over you can do this: start small. Getting started with your biggest task or most difficult action may seem too much and land you in Procrastinationland. So instead, start with something that doesn’t seem so hard. One of my favorites is simply to take a few minutes to clean my desk. After that the next thing doesn’t seem so difficult to get started with since I’m now in a more of a “take action” kind of mode. Experiment with this one and the previous tip and see which one that suits you the best. Or mix them up as you wish.

2. Do it one more time.
Don’t give up too soon. It is very easy to give into feeling that you done something enough times and it will never work. You have tried it as many times as you would expect people to do. But these expectations I believe are often a bit unrealistic.
Society, TV and advertising tell us that there is an almost instant solution to any of our problems. You can easily lose 30 pounds within a month. Or with little work and time invested have another extra 20 000 dollars in the bank.
So it is not unreasonable to think that success will come quickly. But instead of doing something as many times as you think others have done it, talk to and read about people who have actually done what you want to do. This will give you a more realistic picture of reality.
Oftentimes you may have to do it more than one more time. But I have often found that doing it just one more time, doing it that extra time even though you may start to feel that this won’t work, can bring the results you want in many cases. I actually feel a little bit of excitement sometimes when I feel like giving up because then I remember that at this point success is often not that far away.
3. Do the unusual thing.
When faced with a choice in your daily life, step back for a minute and think. Then take the option that is and feels unusual for you.
If you often back down just don’t for this one time. If you are often get into arguments with people then just this one time don’t and instead just let it go or treat the other person with kindness. Do the opposite of what you usually do and see what happens (while using common sense of course). Do something new and something you wouldn’t expect from yourself.
This is a fun a great way to get new experiences and learn things you wouldn’t if you kept going like you usually do.
Getting stuck in the same old routine until it becomes a rut can suck the life out of you. Doing the unusual thing in small and big situations, no matter how it goes, is a great way to feel alive again.
4. Do less.
How do you find time to do what you really want? How do you not get caught up in minor tasks and fill you day with them?
By setting limits. By being a bit ruthless and cutting down on the least important stuff. At some point you will probably have to be honest with yourself and realize that you can never fit all that you want into your day or week. Something has to go. Not only because it takes up time. But also because you only have so much energy, focus and creativity available during your day. If spend it on the less important things then all of that will be gone each day before you get to the big stuff.
It may not be fun to give up a couple of those TV-shows or hanging out on Facebook. But to make room for something new you sometimes have throw out a couple of old things.
5. Do your best.
Why should you do your best? Why not coast a bit and do just what is expected?
Three reasons:

• You get better results. Sometimes immediately. Often not right away, but as all your awesome work adds up you start to see new and exciting results.
• You raise your self esteem. When you do what you think is the right thing – like doing your best – then your self esteem goes up. If you just coast then you tend to feel kinda lame about yourself. So do awesome work and you feel awesome about yourself. Do ok work and feel ok about yourself.
• Deservedness. When you feel awesome about yourself you do also feel like you deserve more in life. So you go after it and you won’t self-sabotage as much when opportunities pop up.

How to Cut the Irrelevant Stuff Out of Your Life: 3 Helpful Questions

“I’ll be floating like a butterfly and stinging like a bee.”
“I wish people would love everybody else the way they love me. It would be a better world.”
“A man who views the world the same at fifty as he did at twenty has wasted thirty years of his life.”
I’m guessing Muhammad Ali doesn’t need a long introduction. As an amateur he won the Olympic Gold. He then went on to become a three-time World Heavyweight Champion.
And in 1999, Sports Illustrated and the BBC named him as “the Sportsman of the Century”.
But what can we learn from one of the best boxers of all time?
Well, here are five tips from Muhammad Ali on how to break through the barriers in the world and in your mind.
1. Take a risk.
“He who is not courageous enough to take risks will accomplish nothing in life.”
To get what you really want you will pretty much always have to take risks. Of course, that can be scary.
So how can you overcome this, take a leap and take the risk? I don’t have some simple and easy solution. But I do have a few tips.
Really, really want it. When you really want it simply becomes easier to push through the inner resistance you feel. You are so motivated to achieve whatever it is you want that the risk may be scary but smaller than your desire.
Ask yourself: what’s the worst that could happen? We often build big, negative fantasies in our heads of what may happen if we do something. Huge scary monsters. But probably 90 percent of what you fear never comes into reality. This is of course easy to say. But if you remind yourself of how little of what you feared throughout your life that has actually happened you can start to release more and more of that worry from your thoughts.
Detach from the outcome. When you are actually doing and taking the risk in real-time detach from the outcome. Just focus on what’s in front of you. Things will become easier. You’ll create less inner anxiety and pressure for yourself. And you will perform better because you are totally focusing on what’s right in front of you and not weighing yourself down with a lot of self-created negativity and doubts.
Every time you take the leap and take a risk – even if things might not go your way that time – you can build confidence in yourself. By getting more experiences where you took action instead of sitting on your hands it will over time becomes easier to start moving in the direction you desire and take a chance.
2. Steer clear of self-sabotage and creating inner obstacles.
“It isn’t the mountains ahead to climb that wear you out; it’s the pebble in your shoe.”
This is a big problem because often you don’t even know that you are for example self-sabotaging. You think that the thought loops that spinning around in your head is reality. But you can’t predict the future. But you are so stuck in your thoughts that you believe them as if they where the absolute truth.
Again, one way to gain a sober perspective is to ask: what’s really the worst that could happen? And then you can make a plan to handle that worst case scenario if it were to come into reality.
Another important thing here is to do what you think is the right thing in life as much as you can. Why? Because when you do that you start to build an image of yourself as someone who deserves the good things that come to him/her. Self-sabotage comes from thinking that you on some level simply aren’t worthy of what you want. So you sabotage for yourself along the way to get yourself back into the place or level of success you feel you deserve. So you have to make yourself feel more deserving.
Doing the right thing isn’t always easy. But you choose to go and work out instead of lying on the couch and watching TV. You choose to be kind instead of petty or judgemental. You choose to take a chance instead of not taking it. And a lot of the time you might not do the right thing. But by just increasing the number of times you do it during your week little by little you can really change how you view yourself. And over time this habit can become stronger and stronger.
Now, another essential thing to avoid self-sabotage and creating mind-monsters is this…
3. Keep your self-talk positive.
“It’s the repetition of affirmations that leads to belief. And once that belief becomes a deep conviction, things begin to happen.”
“I am the greatest, I said that even before I knew I was.”
“I’m so fast that last night I turned off the light switch in my hotel room and was in bed before the room was dark.”
If you are always negative and down on yourself it will be a lot more painful and sometimes pretty much impossible to achieve what you want. Keeping the self-talk in your head positive is essential. You can make that easier to by following the tips above.
Another helpful thing is just to be mindful of how you think about things. To say “Stop!” and cut off negative thought threads before they become strong. Just cut them off as often as you alert enough to do so. And replace them with more positive thought spirals by asking yourself questions like “What’s awesome about this?” and “What can I learn from this?”.
Keeping your self talk positive may seem cheesy or uncool. But beating yourself up all the time is far worse and really not helping you at all.
Plus, the thing is that your self-talk is contagious. Because how you talk to yourself affects how you feel. And as we know from bumper stickers, enthusiasm (and any other feeling) is contagious. And as we know from Ali, this self-talk can also start to seep out into what you say out loud too.
As you interact with people, there is always a social feedback loop. People tend to treat you as you see yourself and as a reaction to how you make them feel. Someone with very positive self-talk will probably be perceived as confident and positive and therefore be treated a certain way. Someone who thinks s/he is a loser and is always down on him/herself may be met with sympathy but also irritation or simply that people tend to avoid that person.
And since people and support is essential to just about any success you may desire your self-talk – and how you talk out loud – becomes very important.
Now, the social feedback loop is about what you really feel about yourself. Not that you repeat affirmations all day that you don’t believe in. So you need to start doing the right thing too, because positive real-life experiences have a deeper impact on how you feel about yourself than just making the self-talk more positive. At least in my experience.
4. Don’t make a big deal out of it.
“It’s just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up.”
So you create a more positive self-image by doing the right thing and keeping your self-talk more positive. But it’s also a good thing to not go overboard. To not grow a huge ego and come off as arrogant or well, like a jerk.
This may be a bit counter-intuitive but not making a big deal out of what you are good at have some big benefits.
Less defensiveness and negativity. I could for instance create a big ego around the fact that I have many readers on this blog. And that would feel awesome for a while. But sooner or later my head would become too big and I would come off in negative way. And if people would question what I am saying I would start to feel more and more threatened and nervous. Because I would have a big image to live up to and defend each day. I think it’s a lot easier to keep the self-talk positive but also just be a guy who knows some stuff, has done some things and write about all of that.
Makes the doing easier and more enjoyable. If you think it’s a big deal then it becomes a big deal. And things become unnecessarily hard and complicated. You start to create monsters in your mind again. Your ego may want you to think that it’s big, big deal because it means that you are a big, big deal too. That effect is enjoyable but makes the doing harder and less fun after a while as the inner pressure starts to ramp up.
5. Use your emotional leverage to succeed.
“Only a man who knows what it is like to be defeated can reach down to the bottom of his soul and come up with the extra ounce of power it takes to win when the match is even.”
If you are here or have an interest in personal development then you have probably hit a point sometime in your past where you said “Enough of this! Something has to change”. Or you felt like you hit rock bottom. Now that isn’t fun. But as Ali says, it’s also there you can find that extra motivation and power to push through.
If you were unhealthy and overweight you feel like you never want to go back to that again. If you didn’t get anything done, procrastinated all day and felt like crap you don’t want to go back to that. If you were buried in a mountain of debt you want to never go back to that place or headspace again.
When you have had enough you will find a way to change your life. And I’m not saying that you should be driven by a fear to never return back to where you were. But to simply remind yourself of how it where back then when things get tough. And realize that yes, it may be hard right now. But it is temporary. And it’s definitely better than it used to be.
Your worst times may not be fun at all when they are happening. But later on they can be some of the most helpful and powerful experiences of your life

Six Fundamentals of an Optimistic Life

A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.”Winston Churchill

“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”
Maria Robinson
“It’s better to be an optimist who is sometimes wrong than a pessimist who is always right.”
Unknown
Negative thinking can poison what – from the outside – looks like a pretty good life with opportunities. Pessimism can create ceilings and walls made out of glass where there really are none.
With such forces controlling your inner life your outer life tends to stand pretty still. Your time here waste away. It’s a terrible thing.
But you can change. I have. And in this article I’ll share six fundamentals that have been essential for me to make that mental change.
These are things that actually work in real life to change how you view things. However, just knowing these things won’t change your thinking. You have to practice them and fail from time to time and then get back up again and keep using them until they become new habits of thinking.
Focus on what you want.
What do you think about most of the time? Your troubles and worries? If that is the case, if you spend your attention on focusing on what you don’t want then it’s easy to feed the negativity monster in your mind with more energy and to get stuck in analysis paralysis.
But if you instead spend most of your time thinking about what you want out of life in various areas then you become more focused. Your mind starts to spit out solutions to your obstacles. You feel like taking action to start moving step by step towards your goals.
So focus on what you want. Post reminders on post-its and whiteboards in your surroundings to keep your attention where it needs to be. Write down your goal and focus single-mindedly to taking yourself towards it. Ask yourself questions that helps you find the useful and positive such as:
What’s awesome about this situation?
And what is the hidden opportunity in this situation?
Be grateful for what you got.
What you want is something out there in the future. But it is also important to view what you have in the right way to keep an optimistic viewpoint.
So appreciate the little and big things in life you have instead of focusing too much on what you don’t have.
Ask yourself: what can I be grateful for in my life right now?
When I ask myself that question I often come up with simple answers such as the roof over my head, the delicious food on my table, having the opportunity to sleep in and the people closest to me.
Avoid negative generalizations.
Negative generalizations about life can really wreck your outlook.
If you for example run into an obstacle or problem then the negative thinker may generalize this as something that is just there and will continue to stay there. While the optimistic thinker views the obstacle as something temporary that can be overcome by taking action (even if that also means failing and learning a few things along the way).
If the negative thinker runs in criticism then s/he may generalize this as something personal, like the other person is out to get him/her and that s/he is somehow a bad or generally an incompetent person just because this piece of criticism.
The optimistic thinker on the other hand will keep some distance to the criticism. S/he thinks that the piece of criticism may be valid for this area of life rather than saying something about everything (if the criticism is about not being on time for meetings at work then that is the issue that needs to be corrected, it does not mean a bad performance in all areas of that job).
The optimistic thinker also keeps in mind that criticism may sometimes not be valid but will arise because the other person has had a bad day, is irritated about something else or hates some part of his or her own life.
Shape the input.
If you let pessimistic and negative thinking into your mind then it will be pretty much impossible to stay optimistic about life.
So shape the input.
Take a closer look at what movies, TV, news, books and music you consume and how they affect you. Look at how the people closer to you too such as friends and family affect your thoughts.
Then take action to reduce or cut out the most negative sources as best you can and replace that void in your life with more time with the positive influences.
Set the context for your day.
What you do early in the day often sets the context for that day. A good start leads to good day and a bad start to a bad day.
Some suggestions that will help you to set the positive context for the day:

• Spend a few minutes in the morning on thinking about what you want and your goals. This sends you off to highly motivated and focused day.
• Spend a few minutes being grateful for what you got. This sets you up for a positive mood throughout the day.
• Exercise. This will help you release inner tensions and worry and fill the space they occupied within you with new energy.
• Do the most important thing first. This is how I start my day. Today I woke up and did my usual morning ritual that ends with doing the most important thing on my to-do list. And so I started to write this article. This not only makes sure that the most important thing gets done each day. It also makes me feel good about myself and makes the rest of the to-do list feel lighter to move through.

So make an effort early in the day. It really pays off even if you may not always feel like it just after breakfast.
Be good and kind to yourself.
How you view yourself and treat yourself has a huge impact on how you view the world around you and interact with it.
You are at the centre of your world and if you like yourself and are good to yourself then it becomes a lot easier to thinking optimistically about your future and the world around you.
Here are a few of the best ways to be good and kind to yourself:

• Do the right thing. Do what you deep down think  is the right thing as much as you can – but accept that you will never be able to do it all the time – to increase your self-esteem and your sense of the things you deserve in life.
• Write down five things each night that you are grateful for about yourself. Or appreciate yourself by doing a two minute exercise where you just list small and big things about yourself that you like and good things you have done. You can do this exercise in your mind or on a piece of paper. These two self-appreciation exercises will help you create better thinking habits. Because the more you do things like these, the more this kind of thinking will naturally pop up in your everyday life too. You are changing how you think about yourself and what you have a tendency to focus on (both in yourself and in the world around you).
• Don’t beat yourself up. It’s just a stupid habit and no one will reward you for it. And it only makes it harder to improve since you will probably start to procrastinate to avoid the pain of your own future self-beatings for example.

If you found this article helpful, please share it with someone on Facebook, Twitter and Stumbleupon. Thank you very much! =)

The Simple and Timeless Guide to Creating Your Own Good Luck

“I never knew an early-rising, hard-working, prudent man, careful of his earnings, and strictly honest who complained of bad luck.”
Henry Ward Beacher

“We must believe in luck. For how else can we explain the success of those we don’t like?”
Jean Cocteau

“Many an opportunity is lost because a man is out looking for four-leaf clovers.”
Unknown

Luck. Some hope for more of it. Some don’t believe in it. Some think that everyone but themselves are lucky.

But can you create more of your own good luck in life? Here are a few timeless thoughts on that topic.

Work hard. Be proactive.

“I’m a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work, the more luck I have.”
Thomas Jefferson

“To hell with circumstances; I create opportunities.”
Bruce Lee

This is in my experience very true. The more I work, the more I take chances and am proactive in life the more times I tend to be lucky.

Just sitting around and waiting for some good luck to land in your lap tends to be a pretty bad strategy. Creating your own opportunities and taking massive action simply gives you more of most things. Even luck.

Also, the more you practice the more you improve a deciding factor like your intuition. A better gut feeling can result in more good decisions that may seem lucky from an outside perspective.

Be prepared.

“Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity.”
Seneca

“One-half of life is luck; the other half is discipline – and that’s the important half, for without discipline you wouldn’t know what to do with luck.”Carl Zuckmeyer

Now you that you have spotted an opportunity, what to do? Exactly.

It’s a great idea to have an idea about how you can use an opportunity in a way benefits you. If you are unprepared both then it’s easy to fumble away half of your lucky moments.

So, read. Talk about what you want with others that have more experience and knowledge than you. Ask them a lot of questions. Practice, educate yourself and form effective habits so that you are ready to make good and useful decisions and put in the hard and focused work when the opportunity arises.

Luck may often just be the golden rule.

“Your luck is how you treat people.”
Unknown

As you treat someone else she or he will feel like treating you. Maybe not today or tomorrow. But over time these things have a way of evening out.

So what looks like someone being lucky a lot from an outside perspective may just be he or she using the golden rule in a helpful way.

Being unlucky can be a sort of luck for you too.

“Luck never made a man wise.”
Seneca

“All of us have bad luck and good luck. The man who persists through the bad luck – who keeps right on going – is the man who is there when the good luck comes – and is ready to receive it.”
Robert Collier

“Each misfortune you encounter will carry in it the seed of tomorrow’s good luck.”
Og Mandino

Having some bad luck can in many ways be a good thing too.

When things are rough but you somehow get through them you tend to gain strength and perhaps a bit of wisdom and perspective on life. It may not have been fun. But those gains can be very helpful in the future.

I think that things do often balance out over time. You have a bad meeting, date, day or even week. But, in my experience at least, then you often have something good happen or you get a lucky break the next day or week. Of course, in that situation it is important to be attentive and not still be focusing on that negative situation in the past.

The important thing is to keep going through ups and downs. The worst thing is when you just go passive and don’t do anything. Because then nothing seems to happen in a good long while.

I also find it useful to ask helpful questions when having a “negative situation”. Question like these:

• What is the good thing about this?
• What can I learn from this?
• What hidden opportunity can I find within this situation?

At first it might seem stupid to ask such a thing when having a bad day/meeting/test in school or date. But after a while you get used to it and your mind even starts to do it automatically from time to time.

Another important benefit of having some bad luck is what Robert Collier mentions above. When the good luck comes you are ready to recieve it.

You feel that after that bad luck you actually deserve your lucky break. This ties into hard work too. When you feel you have deserved your lucky break then you will have no or less problem with taking it.

There will be less self sabotage. There will be less situations where you start telling yourself that you can’t handle it or don’t deserve it.

You just go for it. And by having kept on going through the rough times you have gained strength and wisdom that will enable you to make the best out of this new and lucky situation.

5 Reasons to Slow Down Your Life Today, and How to Do It

“The time to relax is when you don’t have time for it.”
Jim Goodwin

“For fast-acting relief, try slowing down.”
Lily Tomlin
“Slow down and enjoy life. It’s not only the scenery you miss by going to fast – you also miss the sense of where you are going and why.”
Eddie Cantor
The world is moving at breakneck speed. Information is overflowing 24 hours a day. At work or in school we are busy, busy, busy. Lunch is wolfed down. When we get home there is still so much to do, so much we want before finally falling into the bed.
Sometimes this works fine. Sometimes this can cause problem, feelings like it’s all just too much and like you are not in control.
So I like to slow things down.
In this article I would like to explain why and how to do it practically.
If you are feeling like your speed in life is causing difficulties try one or a few of these things and see how they work for you.
1. You can lose or maintain weight.
It takes about 20 minutes for your brain to register that you are full. That’s because the food has to reach the intestines before your body starts sending signals telling your brain that you feel full. By slowing down your eating your brain can stop you before you eat too much.
I have found that that if I eat too fast then I usually eat about 15-25% more before I feel full. If you do this every day of the week those extra calories can quickly add up.
How to slow down:

• Eat before you get ridiculously hungry. If you’re really hungry it will be hard to eat slowly. The best way to avoid this is to not wait for too long but to eat when you feel just a little hungry. Or to have your meals at specified times during the day that you know from experience will be appropriate to avoid getting too hungry.
• Put down your fork between the bites. The classic advice is to put down your fork and then chew. Then to pick up your fork again after you’ve swallowed, take another bite and repeat the process. I like this tip because it forces you to slow down. Instead of taking that stressed energy from your day and just letting it power through the meal too as you quickly wolf down everything on your plate.
• Focus on the food and yourself. Not on what other people are doing.It’s easy to get drawn into someone else’s pace while eating (just like when driving or running). Be conscious of keeping your own pace instead of just unconsciously eating as fast as everyone around the table might do.

2. You can lower your stress levels.
When you feel like life is going to fast then you feel like you are losing control over it or barely hanging on. This, as you also probably have noticed, can cause a lot of unnecessary stress.
How to slow down: Simply do the things you are doing slower. If you are moving quickly then just take a deep breath and slow down your movement and your pace when walking. Drive your car and ride your bike a little slower. As mentioned above, eat slower. Take in life around you a bit instead of focusing on setting a new speed record.
3. You can gain clarity and find and do what is most important.
As everything moves a bit too fast it is easy to get lost. If you don’t think about what you are doing then you can easily get lose half your work day doing busywork. You mind just think “Hurry, hurry, hurry! What is the next thing?” instead of “What is the best use of my time and energy?”
How to slow down: When I get lost in such frantic and stressful activity I take a deep breath. I just take in my surroundings for a minute or two to relax and reconnect with this present moment. Then I ask myself:
What is the most important thing I can do right now?
Or I ask myself: If I only had two hours to work today then what would I spend those two hours working on?
As you take a breath, slow down and reconnect with what is most important a calm and focused energy and effectiveness replaces the frantic and stressed energy of a mind that is going too fast for its own good. Then you can take action and start doing the most important things one at a time.
This is not only helpful for daily decisions but for bigger decisions too. As you slow down it becomes easier to find a healthy perspective and to think things through in a clear and calm way.
4. You can get new ideas and let creativity flow again.
If your mind is constantly bombarded with new information, voices and sounds then it will be very hard to find room for creativity and for getting new ideas. Influences are good for creativity but a overload of input just makes you feel like your mind is overstuffed and like you are just trying to keep up with it all.
So you may need to slow down and free up some space in that mind.
How to slow down: Take a break. Or take a walk. Sit down in nature and watch the ocean. Or take a shower. Or take a while to just lie down on your bed and sofa and shut out the world for that time. Just be there without much thought about what you want to do or about the past or future. Just relax and be there and focus on the world around you.
The thing is that when you don’t focus on needing new ideas or on needing to be creative then your mind starts to relax and work on its own. And soon ideas start to pop up out of nowhere in your mind. Just be sure to write them down immediately as they can pass and disappear out into the world quickly again.
5. You can connect with the present moment and just fully enjoy what is happening right now.
When you are aligned with the present moment you tend to feel good and relaxed. Your mood is optimistic. You do your work in a focused manner and the social part of your life tends to go smoother and become more fun. You do things well without having to think that much at all really. You are flowing.
This is a wonderful headspace to spend as much of your week in as you can. You feel and work better this way.
This is also a good headspace to simply enjoy your life. It helps you appreciate the little and big things in life fully because you are fully there when they happen instead of planning for the future or reliving the past so intensely that you can’t fully appreciate and enjoy a meal, a conversation with a friend or a walk by the ocean.
How to slow down:
I usually just slow down what I am doing and go to a full stop. Then I take in my surroundings fully as they are happening right now for a minute or two.
I listen to the cars going by the house. I watch my desktop and the glass of water next to it. I may look out the window and see blue sky, the white snow and the cold air outside standing still. I feel the slight chilliness of the floor, the warmth in the air in this room and I feel the cold water in my mouth as I take a sip.
This is all I focus on as I slow down my day for a few minutes to move out of confusion, stress and daydreaming and into this moment. It may sound a bit odd but it makes a world of difference.

How to Bridge the Distance Between You and Someone Else

Today I would like to share three of my favorite tips for making it easier to establish a relationship with someone. Maybe in a new class. On a date. At work or in a job interview. Or at some party next weekend.
Assume rapport.
This one can work quickly. That is, if you can suspend your disbelief for while and keep your mind open. It won’t work if you don’t think it will work.
So, what is assuming rapport?
Basically, instead of going into a conversation or meeting nervously and thinking “how will this go?” you take different approach. You assume that you and the person(s) will establish a good connection (rapport).
How do you do that? Just before the meeting, you just think/pretend that you’ll be meeting a good friend. Then you’ll naturally slip into a more comfortable, confident and enjoyable emotional state and frame of mind. In this state of mind the conversation tends to flow more naturally too, without much thinking. Just like with your friends.
I have used this small tip many dozens of times by now and have found it surprisingly useful and easy to implement. It’s a sort of variation of acting as you would like to feel.
This tip also helps you and the other people to set a good frame for the interaction. A frame is always set at the start of an interaction. It might be a nervous and stiff frame, a formal and let’s-get-to-the-point kind of frame or perhaps a super relaxed one. The thing is that the frame that is set in the beginning of the conversation is often one that may stay on for a while. First impressions can last for quite some time.
Now, meeting your best friend might not always be the best thing to think about before a meeting at school/work. In that case you may want to try to imagine a similar meeting that went well and your interactions with the people there.
But what if you come off as a weird person? Well, that is always a risk in the beginning when you start using this tip. But I believe that most of the time such thoughts are only in your head. No one likes awkward and uncomfortable interactions. So if you just assume rapport immediately then most people that may have been nervous/felt awkward will adapt to your more comfortable and relaxed frame.
This is also a quick way to reconnect with the mental and emotional state your friends might be referring to when they give you the classic advice to “just be yourself”.
See yourself in other people.
“Who sees all beings in his own self, and his own self in all beings, loses all fear.”
Isa Upanishad, Hindu Scripture
The ego wants to divide your world. It wants to create barriers, separation and loves to play the comparison game. The game where people are different compare to you, the game where you are better than someone and worse than someone else. All of that creates fear in social situations. Doing the opposite removes fear.
That there is no real separation between beings, that we are one and the same, might sound a bit corny.
But one thought you may want to try for a day is that everyone you meet is your friend. You do this practically by using the previous tip.
Another idea is to see what parts of yourself you can see in someone you meet.
As I mentioned above, there is pretty much always a frame set in any interaction. It may make you and the others feel awkward or comfortable. But underlying such feelings is a frame of mind.
Either it asks us how we are different from this person. Or how we are the same as this person. The first frame is based in how the ego likes to judge people and create separation to strengthen itself (either through feeling better or more like a victim). The second one creates warmth, an openness and curiosity within. There is no place to focus on fear or judgement anymore.
Practise.
Although the two ideas above can be very useful, the most important thing – as with anything – is practise. By doing things and learning from mistakes, failures and successes you can improve any part of your life. Your social skills too.
But just reading some tips will not magically improve any of your skills or transform you in some way. You do that yourself by being patient and persistent.
One interesting thing I have discovered after having been interested in personal development, positive thinking etc. for a few years now is that over time you can improve what may be called emotional and mental flexibility.
What I mean by that is that you don’t become so identified with your current thoughts and emotions. You realize that they are just there right now but will not be there forever. You stop being so reactive to what happens in your surroundings and stop thinking that you need to feel/think a specific way in a specific situation.
What you feel and think becomes more of a choice. Just like you can choose to turn right or left while walking. I don’t use assuming rapport in the way I mentioned above that much anymore. I have slipped into that emotional state so many times by now I can just recall how it feels to be relaxed and comfortable and choose to put myself in that state. It doesn’t work all the time of course, but most of the time it does.
But if you have been totally identified with your feelings and thoughts for decades then it can be hard snap out of that. Choosing how you think and feel may sound kinda stupid or impossible.
That is why you need to practise. To convince itself and to silence your inner doubts your mind needs proof that this stuff actually works for you. The proof is the experiences you have.
And by practise I mean using, for example, assuming rapport a couple of dozen times. Not two or three times.
By being open and believing that this stuff works and by practising it over and over – just like a tennis serve – it become easier and easier to do it

How to Spread Positivity in Your World Today

You must be the change you want to see in the world.”
Mahatma Gandhi

“Though I might travel afar, I will meet only what I carry with me, for every man is a mirror. We see only ourselves reflected in those around us. Their attitudes and actions are only a reflection of our own. The whole world and its condition has its counter parts within us all. Turn the gaze inward. Correct yourself and your world will change.”
Kirsten Zambucka
Improving your attitude and living a more positive life overall can take a lot of time and effort. But a part of it can also be simple. You can spread positivity around you with small actions.
This will not only make you and other people feel better today. Over time you tend to get what you give. You will make it easier for yourself to live a more positive life in the long run too.

• Smile. Smiling puts you and the people around you into a more positive mood. It even works when you don’t feel much like smiling. Just try forcing a smile for 30 seconds if you are feeling a bit negative and see what happens.
• Give a genuine compliment. Compliments are awesome. But make it a genuine one. Make sure you really mean it or it may have the opposite effect as your insincerity shines through. Find something a bit unexpected – like great taste in old soul music rather than looks – and something that is important to the other person and make a positive, appreciative comment about that.
• Hugs. A hug is, just like smiling, a simple physical thing that can make anyone feel a little better. People love hugs.
• Encourage someone. There is much discouragement in the world. You may hear from people around you, you may receive much negativity from the TV and newspapers. Many will back down from doing something they want because of that atmosphere of discouragement. So instead, be an exception and encourage people to believe in themselves and what they want to do.
• Change the way you feel. Emotions are contagious. So to spread positivity, know how you can create and sustain a positive attitude and optimistic mood. Know how to pick yourself up out of slumps. Besides smiling, you can also appreciate life more, change your physiology, act as you would like to feel, ask better questions and recall positive memories to make a quick emotional shift. Read all about those things in this article.
• Help someone out in practical way. Maybe it’s not encouragement that is needed. Maybe it’s a practical solution. So lend someone a hand when they are moving. Or give them a ride in your car. Or if they need information, try to find a solution via Google or by asking the people you know.
• Just listen. Sometimes people don’t want any help. They just want to vent or for someone to listen as they figure out things. It may not seem like much but it can be an immense help for someone who needs it. So be there fully – don’t sit there thinking about something else – and listen.
• Put things into perspective. It’s easy to get wrapped up in a problem and to make a mountain out of a molehill. But you can help out by adding your perspective. The two of you can talk about it, perhaps laugh about it and even find the hidden opportunity within the problem that in one person’s head may have almost seemed like the sky was falling.
• Play positive music. Uplifting music is of course a great way to boost your own mood. You can do the same for people around you. Put on a really positive song when you are hanging out. Or send them an uplifting playlist for Spotify or a link to a video on Youtube.
• Perform a random act of kindness. Just holding up the door or pointing out the way for someone who seems lost can be a way to spread a little bit of positivity. It’s always nice when someone you don’t even know does something kind for you.
• Pay it forward. If a friend or stranger spreads a bit of positivity to you then in some way pay it forward. Spread the positivity on to another person and let an upward spiral of positivity grow and expand in your world. 

Four Timeless Thoughts on the Most Optimistic of Seasons

“Spring is when you feel like whistling even with a shoe full of slush.”
Doug Larson

“An optimist is the human personification of spring.”
Susan J. Bissonette

Spring is finally here in Sweden. Well, kinda. I guess it’s more of a feeling of spring in the way that Doug Larson so awesomely points out in the quote above.

But still. After an unusually long and very cold winter it’s great to have some warmth, a few birds singing and see more smiling and enthusiastic faces as you walk the streets.

So I thought I’d share a few of my favorite sayings about spring that can help us to make this year the best one yet.

Make decisions at the right time.

“Never cut a tree down in the wintertime. Never make a negative decision in the low time. Never make your most important decisions when you are in your worst moods. Wait. Be patient. The storm will pass. The spring will come.”
Robert H. Schuller

I think this is a very good tip and something I wish I had thought about a few times in the past. When you are in the low time or a bad mood you can’t really see reality in an accurate way. Making important or negative decisions when you are in that headspace isn’t a good idea.

Nowadays I have a learned to just be still and wait out those angry clouds. Even if it feels like there is an urgent decision to be made (which isn’t always the case even though your clouded mind may fool you into believing that).

Then, when the mind is clearer it becomes a lot easier to make a good decision.

Be consistent to get some real results.

“One swallow does not make a spring, nor does one fine day.”
Aristole

To live a happier life and make a real change you can’t just take action or do things on a day when you feel inspired. Sure, the spring may give you a boost of energy and inspiration right now.

But what will you do with that? Just surf on those good feelings for a day or a week? Or let it be a start to consistently taken action each day, even if that inspiration and initial enthusiasm may dissipate (which it pretty much always does)?

To take action more consistently here are a two of my absolute favorite tips:

• Use a morning ritual. I have mentioned this many times, both in my e-books and in various articles. The reason for that is that this is perhaps the most powerful tip I have found so far in this area. You simply set up a ritual in the morning that you do as soon as you wake up. This works so well because what you do early in the day often sets the context for your day. As humans we have a strong tendency to want to be consistent with what we have done before. That’s one big reason why a bad start often leads to a bad day and a good start often leads to a good day. Read all about my and other people’s morning rituals in this article.
• Don’t hurt yourself. This is a very important reason for me. When you disappoint yourself and don’t think and do as you really deep down want to you hurt yourself by lowering your self esteem. Whatever you do during your day sends signals back to yourself about what kind of person you are. Do the right thing like being effective, kind or go to the gym and you feel good. Get lazy, negative or just plain mean and you tend to feel worse after a while. You don’t get away, there is no escaping yourself. And there is always a price to pay. This is a powerful motivator to become a better person.

Keep going.

“No winter lasts forever; no spring skips its turn.”
Hal Borland

Persistence might not exactly be the sexiest sounding quality. It might not sell a lot of products to people looking for the magic pill. But it is an immensely helpful quality to cultivate and put to use.

If you fail, what do you do? You dust yourself off, learn what you can from what happened and try again. If the success you are looking for won’t come that quickly – a pretty likely scenario – then you have to persist.

Persistence is one of the most useful qualities one can have. Not only because you will still be out there in a less competitive playing field as a lot of other people have given up and gone home. But also because developing persistence will enable you to get what you want. It may just take a little longer than had hoped for. But if you keep going, if you refine your approach based on what you learn from experience and other sources then better times will come.

Winter makes the spring so much better.

“If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant: if we did not sometimes taste of adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome.”
Anne Bradstreet

The winter of life is often in retrospect a gift. It makes you stronger. More empathetic and understanding. It helps you out in some way and guides you. You can always look back at it when you feel down and be happy that you aren’t in that place anymore.

Your winter and adversities expands the spectrum of human experience, understanding and emotions for you. Your capacity for genuine gratitude increases because of it.

The sad times make the happy times even sweeter.

The Extremely Simple Guide to Handling the Overwhelm in 3 Quick Steps

Life is often filled to the brim. There are many things to do and if you’re like me I’m sure you feel overwhelmed and stressed out sometimes.

What to do then? Here’s what I do and the three simple steps I follow to go from a stressed and overwhelmed headspace to one with clarity, calmness and a sense of direction within minutes.
1. I reconnect with the present moment.
When you feel overwhelmed you are stuck in your mind, you are stuck on all the things you have done and all the things you have to do today and perhaps even this week and month.
No wonder you feel overwhelmed and stressed out. So when I feel this way I reconnect with the present moment. I just focus on my breathing for two minutes. Just the in- and outbreath and nothing else.
Or I spend two minutes just taking in what is right here right now. The computer in front of me. The sunlight through the window that warms me. The buses and traffic going by outside and the clear blue sky. I use all my senses to just focus on what is happening around me right now and nothing else.
By doing so I align myself fully with what is happening right now instead of being somewhere in the past or future or both of them inside my mind.
Yes, I still have the same things to do. But the overwhelm that was is in my mind because I was looking at things from a perspective that hurt me loses it’s power.
2. I ask myself: what is the most important thing I can do right now?
Usually the answer is that I need to work on things that aren’t urgent but very important such as a new digital product or looking at and starting to explore new opportunities.
3. I stop thinking and take action in a single-tasking manner.
Then, when I have come up with the answer – usually by consulting my to-do list on teuxdeux.com – I get to work. I do not think about it for a few minutes since that only makes it harder to get started and I often wind up procrastinating away much more than those few minutes.
Instead I focus on just this one task I need to do. I take breaks every hour but keep working on it by single-tasking until it is done. Then I start working on the next task that is now the most important one.
By doing so I use my work hours in the best way I can and I feel good about myself and the work I have done at the end of the day.
This little ritual of three habits can take some time to getting used to and you’ll probably stumble. But after a while I noticed that it became more and more automatic and I felt less inner resistance and could change gears from overwhelmed to focused faster.
So keep practicing even if you stumble. It usually takes at least a month to establish a chain of habits/ritual like this and probably more than a month if all three habits are brand new for you. Be patient with yourself.

One Powerful Tip For When You Feel Like Giving Up on Your New Habit

“Good habits, once established are just as hard to break as are bad habits.”
Robert Puller
Changing a habit can be hard. To make the habit stick you have to keep going until it becomes not something you do through willpower but something you feel drawn to doing. This can take 30 days or more of taking action each day.
But we all have bad days. What do you do on such a day when you just feel like giving up on creating this new habit?
Here’s what I do.
I say to myself: Just for today!
It is important to make yourself realize that the period that you are investing in changing a habit is not the rest of your life.
As mentioned above, if you do something every day for 30 days then that will become a habit and you will feel drawn to doing it or just do it automatically. So it is not about forcing yourself to do this thing on willpower for the next few decades.
Brian Tracy has a great little phrase that makes it easier to take action and just focus on it for today. Tell yourself:
“Just for today I will XX!”
Replace XX with what you will do just for today such as getting exercise, get going on the most important task first thing in the day or eating a healthy lunch.
You can take it one day at a time with this phrase until your habit becomes a natural part of your life, until it becomes something you feel drawn to doing.
I myself don’t use it every day. But I find it very helpful on those days when inner resistance causes me to not feel like continuing doing something until it becomes a habit. Such days are pretty much inevitable.
But by telling myself that I only have to do it today I release the mental burden of the past times I did it and future times when I will do it. And so the task becomes much lighter and the inner resistance melts away.
And guess what, when tomorrow comes I’ll have a good day again with less resistance and I will most likely feel like doing the task again. And that is how I handle a bad day when I am changing a habit.

How to Lift the Stress Out of Your Morning

"Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in, forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day, you shall begin it well and serenely…”
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Another morning. Another day begins.
You get up too early, stumble into the shower and in somewhat of a haze try to get things together and get work or school on time.
But by applying a few simple tips you can make not only the morning but the whole day more relaxed and smooth.

1. Plan the night before. Choose the 2-3 most important tasks and put them on a to-do list. By choosing just the most important stuff instead of a dozen things you are less likely to start procrastinating or realize at the end of the day that you filled it with less important tasks.
2. Pack your bag the night before. This very simple habit can alleviate quite a bit of stress in the morning. If you pack your bag before you go to bed then you don’t have to run around in your house half panicked tomorrow while looking for your books or some important papers.
3. Make your lunch the night before. Pack the leftovers of your dinner in a container and put it in the fridge. Just don’t forget to put it in your bag in the morning. You may even want make an extra serving so you can quickly heat up dinner when you get home from work/school. Doing this the night before will save you a bit of time and possibly a bit of money.
4. Don’t forget to just relax. You can’t get much done if you never get any rest and revitalization. Well, you can for a while but soon you’ll start to feel run down, stressed out and fill up with all kinds of negative emotions pretty much all the time. So take some time to just relax. Meditate in one way or another. Take a warm bath. Take a walk in the woods. Listen to relaxing music. Have some fun with friends and/or family. Release pressure, stress and tension that can come from a hard day’s work so you don’t carry all of that into the following morning.
5. Get enough sleep. It’s tempting to stay up a bit longer and let the “morning-you” take care of the problems – I do for example become more likely to revert to old behaviour patterns such as negativity and being easily stressed – that come from lack of sleep. But be good to yourself at least some days during the week. Go to bed a bit earlier and catch up on your sleep.
6. Use a morning ritual. What you do early in the day often sets the context for your day. We have a tendency to want to be consistent with what we have done before. So a morning ritual that sets the right tone for the day can be a great start. I do for example get up and drink two glasses of water, eat breakfast and drink a cup of yerba maté, brush my teeth, make the bed and declutter for a few minutes. Then I prioritize the items on my to-do list and get started with the most important task. Read more about my morning ritual and the routines of many of the readers right here.
7. Keep everything in its place. If everything has its own place then it is whole lot easier to keep your home reasonably ordered and decluttered from day to day. And to find the keys as you are heading out the door. 

Abraham Lincoln’s Top 10 Fundamentals for Creating a Kick-Ass Life

“Die when I may, I want it said by those who knew me best that I always plucked a thistle and planted a flower where I thought a flower would grow.”

“I am not bound to win, but I am bound to be true. I am not bound to succeed, but I am bound to live by the light that I have. I must stand with anybody that stands right, and stand with him while he is right, and part with him when he goes wrong.”
“With the fearful strain that is on me night and day, if I did not laugh I should die.”
Even if you are not an American – like me – you’ve probably still heard of Abraham Lincoln. He was the president who introduced and worked on measures to free the slaves and led the country through the Civil War. A war that had just ended when Lincoln was assassinated by John Wilkes Booth in Ford’s Theatre.
But what can Abraham Lincoln help us with today? Well, here are 10 powerful and timeless fundamentals. I hope you’ll find something helpful.
1. See the positive in people.
“If you look for the bad in people expecting to find it, you surely will.”
“The way for a young man to rise is to improve himself in every way he can, never suspecting that anybody wishes to hinder him.”
What you focus on you will find. In a situation, in a person. There is always plenty of good things and plenty of bad things to discover.
So you need to keep your focus steadily on what you want to find. Don’t let it waver just because you are in a “negative” situation or someone just said/did something “negative”. If your focus gets scattered, try to get it back into a more useful place as quickly as you can.
You can develop whatever view of the world and people that you like. You can go looking for the negative in people and feel a short burst of good emotions as find something negative about a person and feel like you are “right”.
Or you can develop a habit of looking for the positive. A habit where you can expect people to treat you in a positive way.
Because we do to a large extent teach people how we want to be treated. If we expect other people to help us and treat us well then they are more likely to do so than if we are negative and expect to be treated poorly.
This may sound a bit weird, but how we expect to be treated can have a big effect on how the world sees us.
2. Be honest.
“No man has a good enough memory to be a successful liar.”
This is a pretty practical thing. Being honest will for several reasons work better in the long run. Of course, you don’t have to go out of your way to be honest and hurt people though. You can just as well choose to be silent if you like. Here are just a few practical reasons to minimize or just stop lying altogether.

• Your words aren’t everything. Words are only a pretty small part of communication. The rest are body language and your voice tonality. And it’s through those channels that the real you will shine through. People will in some way sense that something is wrong, that you aren’t being honest and authentic if those other ways you communicate aren’t in alignment with your words. So lying is just a short term solution. Sooner or later people will pick up on it.
• Poor self-image and stress. Cultivating a self-image as someone who lies will make you feel worse about yourself. You’ll feel like a fake and your self-esteem plummets. And if you on the other hand are honest you don’t have to feel like someone that is trapped or on the high-wire all the time.
• People really appreciate authentic communication. What separates people is to a large extent the walls that they build up between themselves. When you put aside personas and lies you can build real connections between you and other people. If you remove these walls of insulation then the people or you are interacting with are likely to reciprocate. And so your relationships can improve and are less likely to be damaged by miscommunication.

3. Unite.
“A house divided against itself cannot stand.”
Ego excludes and divides. The ego loves to make someone “the other” to strengthen its own power. It want’s to feel “more” than someone else. More clever. Prettier. Cooler. Wiser. Or more like a victim.
And by making the other even more wrong in your mind the ego grows stronger. However, the ego boosts of good feelings are just temporary. You have to reinforce them continually, just like a caffeine habit.
Consciousness and intelligence includes and accepts. You don’t have to be seduced by your ego’s wish to make people other than you. You can look at the positive in them and at the things you agree about. And be accepting.
When your thoughts are buzzing around in your head and telling you to exclude or divide in some way then you most often are listening to your ego. It may tell you that paragraphs just above this one are cheesy and stupid. You may not want to take such thoughts too seriously. You don’t have to.
The most useful advice I’ve found so far to get a handle on the need to divide is to not identify so much with my thoughts or feelings. That doesn’t mean that I stop thinking or feeling. It just means that I realize – and remember in my everyday life – that the thoughts and emotions are just things flowing through me. And that I am the consciousness observing them.
When you realize and remember this it enables you to control the thoughts and feelings instead of the other way around. It enables you to not take your thoughts too seriously and actually laugh at them or ignore them when you feel that your ego is acting out.
When you are not being so identified these things you become more inclined to include things, thoughts and people instead of excluding them. This creates a lot of inner and outer freedom and stillness. Instead of fear, a need to divide your world and a search for conflicts.
4. Create a friend where there is none.
“The best way to destroy an enemy is to make him a friend.”
“I don’t like that man. I must get to know him better.”
This is similar to tip #1 and # 3. But slightly different, seen from a slightly different perspective. It is a helpful and a bit unusual way of looking at people who you might perceive as different or other than yourself.
Turning an enemy or someone we don’t like into a friend is difficult because first impressions can be powerful. Our concept of a person can remain intact if we don’t push further and question and explore. But if you get to know someone better you can often find out quite a few positive and interesting things about them. People are often more intriguing than your first impression of them.
Of course, since the ego needs to tell you that you are right and someone else is wrong then it can be hard to change your opinion of someone. That opinion of him/her is tied up in your ego and fuels your sense of being “right”. Again, the key and the way out here is to not take your thoughts or emotions too seriously.
This can allow you to open your mind to a change in the relationship.
Now, how can you make him/her your friend? One suggestion would be to follow tip # 1 and start looking for the positive in the person. Then to take the first step and give some kind of value – like help for instance – to that person. And then to take more steps if s/he is not convinced that you want to change the relationship.
5. Believe in and go after your own success.
“Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any one thing.”
“Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle.”
If you think you can succeed then you can. Your belief in your own ability to succeed is essential and does not only motivate you to keep going.
You may have heard that you  have to believe that you can achieve something to do it and that the how you will do it will then present itself along the way. Well, that is true in my experience. Whatever you focus on persistently you will find in your world. So be careful what you focus on. Remind yourself to keep your focus on what you want to make solutions and people who can help you “pop up” out of all those things and pieces of information that is the background noise of your world.
And don’t wait for too long. Procrastination may just leave you with the crumbs or sometimes nothing really. Taking action is awesome. But taking action with little delay will increase the probability of you actually getting what you want before the window of opportunity closes.
So develop a Just do it! habit. Learn to do some planning but then to take action quickly despite what excuses or other negative things your thoughts and emotions may put up in your way. Know that they may just want to protect you from uncertainty and risks. But also know that you are in charge of them and not the other way around.
6. Persist.
“Hold on with a bulldog grip, and chew and choke as much as possible.”
Persistence might not exactly be the sexiest sounding quality. It might not sell a lot of products to people looking for the magic pill. But it is an immensely helpful quality to cultivate and put to use.
If you fail, what do you do? You dust yourself off and try again. If the success you are looking for won’t come that quickly – a pretty likely scenario – then you have to persist. Persistence may be one of the most useful qualities one can have. Not only because you will still be out there in a less competitive playing field as lot other people have given up and gone home. But also because developing patience and being persistent will enable you to get what you want. It may just take a little longer than had hoped for.
7. Sharpen your ax.
“If I had eight hours to chop down a tree, I’d spend six hours sharpening my ax.”
Instead of just starting to chop with a blunt blade for hours on end it’s a whole lot smarter to first sharpen the blade and then take on the physically harder task of bringing the tree down. This goes for everything.
If you are prepared then it will often be a whole lot easier to get something done. Sometimes it can be the thing that separates people that either keeps chopping until they can’t take it anymore and give up and the people who could get the job done.
So success is not just about doing hard work. It’s also about sharpening your ax at regular intervals and learning new and better ways to take down the trees in your life. And it’s about remembering what trees you want to take down rather than just any tree. However, you don’t want to get stuck in this stage and never take action. As with all things, you have to find a balance by experimenting.
Four suggestions for sharpening your ax are:

• Educate yourself. Do some research into the whatever you want to achieve. Look for the most common mistakes and smart things people do. Read books and online. Talk to people who have already been where you want to go.
• Do. Fail. Learn. Do. Knowledge from external sources is great. But to really understand you have to do things. And learn from your own failures and successes. And then do again with your new understanding in your mind.
• Manage your energy levels. You don’t just have increase your knowledge and understanding of things. You also have to have the physical energy to get things done when you find your opportunity. Otherwise you may just fall into a procrastinating pattern or back down. So workout. Eat enough. Sleep enough. Basic stuff of course. But if you do it consistently then you’ll increase you chances of succeeding when it’s time to start chopping down your trees. With a high energy level it will be easier to persist until you are done.
• Remind yourself where you are going. A lot of not so important busy work can dull your ax. You need to regularly review your plans and remind yourself of your goals and what you really want. If you don’t keep your eyes on where you want to go you might wind up somewhere completely different.

8. Take a responsibility for your own life.
“You have to do your own growing no matter how tall your grandfather was.”
“You cannot help men permanently by doing for them what they could and should do for themselves.”
When we are kids people take care of us. They take responsibility. But to become an adult – and not just a kid in a grown up’s body – one has to take responsibility for oneself. There is no other way. Sure, letting someone else take the responsibility may be easier on you.
But without taking responsibility for yourself how can you be free?
How can you really live up you own potential and dreams?
It can be hard to break out of the comfort zone of having other people taking responsibility for us. But if you don’t then you will be trapped by other people’s standards, expectations and limitations. You have to set your own rules for your life. A bit scary. But also liberating.
9. Happiness is optional.
“Most folks are about as happy as they make their minds up to be.
One big upside of taking responsibility for yourself is that it lets you decide where the standards and limits are set. When you take responsibility for what you do you will also feel that you deserve to do what you feel is right for you, in your life.
And our control and responsibility not only goes for what you do out in the world. But also for your thoughts and emotions. You are to a large extent in charge here too.
When you realise this then you realise that you don’t have to play along with your old patterns of thinking and feeling anymore. You don’t have to play along with is “normal” or common thinking. You don’t have to take your thoughts so seriously. You can choose to not feel insulted when someone says something. You can choose to not to be angry whilst stuck in traffic. You can choose to see the positive in people. And you can choose how happy you will be.
Pain is inevitable in life. But how you choose to process or think about things – and if you let them get stuck in your mind or not – is up to you. Suffering is therefore to a large extent optional. And so is happiness.
10. Live your life fully.
“In the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.”
This one is just beautiful. And I don’t really have much to add. But it might be useful to remind yourself of this saying regularly. Maybe when you feel like you are veering off track. Or when heading into things like small-mindedness, laziness or complacency. Perhaps you want to write it down and put it in a highly visible place so you don’t forget about it.